Spiritual Maturity and VICTORY (or Victoria)

I can't believe it has been six months since we began our journey to Ian.
Six months.

In that time, so very much has happened that I regret not keeping a daily journal.

Still, the things that God is teaching us through this experience, they have stuck, and won't be lost, even if we don't right them down.

Tonight, I want to share one of the things, a big one, that God has taught me through trying to get Ian home, through working everyday on completing an international special needs adoption.

It is about humility. It is about spiritual maturity, and it is NOT about me.

I am an addict. An addict for all of the faces of waiting children listed on Reece's Rainbow. Once you get hooked, there is no way out. You are either going to adopt a child that God has led you to, or you are going to work to help others adopt, or both. Once you know about www.reecesrainbow.org, you become a stalker of the site.

I admit my addiction. I look at Reece's Rainbow at least once per day. My first click is to the "my family found me" page, where I can see the latest child that will be saved. Tonight, my heart was so happy to see "Charity" there. She is saved, thank you God! Some night, two or three kids show up at a time there! It's Christmas everyday on the my family found me page.

I remember when Ian showed up there.

I also remember how long it took me before I could honestly say this, "I am not jealous or envious of other child on Reece's Rainbow who has a full adoption grant, or lots of money in his or her adoption grant fund. I am happy and hopeful for them that a family will step forward."

This took a while for me and here is why. God needs me to be happy for other people no matter what my circumstances are. It is not about what is fair. When Ian had ZERO dollars in his account, and so many others had so much more, I admit that I was jealous. Jealously comes from fear. My fear was that Ian would not get any donations because a family had found him. My fear was that I would not be able to raise up the ransom for Ian in time, my fear was that my faith was not strong enough. I knew what I was feeling was fear, but it was masked by that ugly thing called envy. I even confronted myself on the fact that I felt some degree of anger over people whose adoptions I had supported with donations, who then turned around and gave money to other waiting children, and not to Ian. That was a real tough one to let go, and I KNOW that I am NOT the only one out there who has struggled over the EXACT same things. I felt bad about having those feelings. Feeling bad about it is God's little way to letting me know that I need to study his word and examples in the bible for the answer.

God has used this situation to teach me a lesson that I had to learn, in order to be able to love more and love more genuinely. Motive is everything, and God knows when your motives are not in order, even if you say they are, or act towards others that they are. God knew I needed a teaching on envy, and used a test of trust in him to do so.

You see, as I began to REALLY trust GOD that if I did my absolute best to get Ian home, that he would do the rest. I confronted myself, even before Ian had a single dollar in his grant fund, and I made myself think powerful thoughts that changed me. I thought and prayed and then it happened - I realized that the waiting kids, no matter how much money is in their fund, they are STILL WAITING. Once a family steps forward, and it is usually because of a feeling that God has led them there, that child has his or her own personal warriors.

The WAITING CHILDREN do not. They are not coming home, until someone steps forward. They need all the money in their accounts that can be mustered, to help the family that cannot raise it in time.

God knew, way before I did, that Ian would have so many people loving him by praying and donating to get him home, that he didn't need a full grant for us to step forward. So, that money that might have gone to Ian before we took him off the orphan market, could then go to other WAITING CHILDREN.

Seems simple to you I bet. It was not simple to me. I fought the devil of envy and fear. My victory now allows me to love with more genuine motive. I know that God knows that I am growing up, maturing spiritually, and I am being rewarded in many ways.

Today, Ian has nearly $5,000.00 in his account, which was at ZERO not long ago. God did that. He will get Ian home, and I know that I don't have to let fear disturb the peace that Jesus died for me to have.

Killing envy and jealousy in our lives is so important as Christians if we are to truly help others. We cannot be helping folks on the one hand, while stewing over something that someone else has that we don't. We have to live up to the idea that we trust that God has and will give us everything he intends for us to have, from children, to money, to health. We grow in love, agape love, when we die to self, and killing envy must be a part of our Christian walk.

Yes, we still need to raise up thousands of dollars to get Ian home, but for God, that is not even a ripple in the waters of what his love and mercy do everyday for millions on earth. It will come, and Ian will come home, and he will not die alone in an institution.

As of right now, that IS NOT the case for hundreds of others. ONE in particular.....

There is a little girl that I have been thinking about for such a long time. She never shows up on the My Family Found Me page, and her chances of adoption are slim to none. I am going to advocate for her until my, or her, last breath. If you read this blog, please help me. If you know anyone, anywhere, that is looking for a little girl to adopt, please send them to her page at Reece's Rainbow here: http://reecesrainbow.org/victoria-1

She is not ideal - as our twisted world would have us believe. She is older - almost 9 years old. She has been bedridden her entire life - She has misformed limbs. She is cognitively perfect - although 9 years as an orphan, and many in an institution, have left marks. She is small for her age, and they buzzed her hair.

SHE IS BEAUTIFUL. THIS IS "Victoria."

If she were the next girl adopted from the page where she is listed, her grant would be for $3667.50. That is not enough, she needs more!! Pray for someone to adopt her or step forward with a full grant for her to clear the way for a family.

For Christmas, won't you please pray with your family that someone SEE VICTORIA and come forward for her? Can we let her languish and die after seeing this face? The face of God? I beg of you to share her with people you know. I beg for your prayers for her. I beg God for a family for her, and soon.

Amen.

Our First Fundraiser for Ian

Today we had our first real live fundraiser for Ian. We have been doing word of mouth and emailing like nobody's business, but nothing like an event, until today. How it came about was pretty interesting, but I will post more about that later.

For now, here's the pictures! We offered face painting and balloon toys for donations of any amount. It went very well, the first donation came from a family who got one child's face painted a one balloon....they donated $50.00 for that. I love other people.

Our fund raising table

Ari was the first child to be painted, he was our little advertiser!

The choices for face painting!

More Ian!

Our wonderful face painter, Melanie

Thank you to the Down Syndrome Association of Atlanta for allowing us to attend the Holiday Party and set up this small face painting and balloon making fund raiser for Ian.

HOMESTUDY COMPLETE!

Guess what we have???

that's right people! A completed HomeStudy!!

Praise the Lord! This was a monumental task!

and the result of the homestudy is.....drum roll please......

yep! Approved to adopt 1 male child, age 4-5, with Down Syndrome and other concomitant conditions that can be kept under medical control.

COOL!

Next step...start faxing our adoption agency the 100 plus pages of guk that will become Dossier #1...and oh yea, raise up another $5400.00 so we can be leaving on that jet plane to go meet our boy!

Emotions Running High

I have a 3 new pictures of Ian, but I cannot post them.
I even have a picture of exactly where he sleeps, in a numbered bed, but I cannot post it.
I have seen the orphanage where he lives, but it is classified for now.

Seeing these images of my child's life are a stark reminder of the task at hand.

I also got a first hand account of Ian, which I cannot talk about here.

All I can say is that God is moving and he is working and he is preparing us to be forever changed.

Hallelujah. I am so thankful.

Next Thanksgiving, Ian will be at the table with us, and for every Thanksgiving after that!


We need money for Ian
but I know it will come

what I don't know
is who will come for all of the other children
who do not have families

If we have the power to change our brothers situation, the power to help, than we are commanded by God to do so.

If you have ever considered adoption, look at all of these children who need families.
The need is life critical.
Perhaps, if you pray, God will show you the child he has intended for you!

The Lonley Road

Maybe there is a reason that I was an only child.
Maybe learning to, and learning to enjoy,
spending time alone
was all a part of his master plan.

For me, special needs international adoption can be a very lonely road to walk, despite the manic swirling of papers, money, people, prayer, emotions, and work...
When you think no one cares about what you have been called to do,
When you allow negative thoughts to enter your mind about all the what-ifs,
When you are still more than $20,000.00 short of the money it will take to bring him home,
When your own family members fear the child you love so much already...

Yet, I am strangely comforted, and bask in the warm light of skipping happily along
his path.
Jesus often walked the road alone.
The truth can be a lonely place once your eyes are opened to it.
Still, I would rather walk alone, than be surrounded by people and things that ignore what breaks God's heart.

We will get there, and the hardship of the journey will make it that much sweeter.
I have begun to see the signs of life along his road, and I never want to walk anywhere else.

A piece of US to leave with IAN

All glory to god for putting this special task into the hands of HF, Anna's mommy. Words can never be enough. We hope to leave this book with Ian when we are forced to leave him at the orphanage after our first trip. We don't want him to think we just left him and that we are not coming back.

Growing

Ian is growing up, and we are missing him. Ian is growing up, and we are growing closer to having to fork over a great deal of money that is still hiding from us. I know it will come, I don't know where from, but I sure hope it comes soon:)

We love this kid so much already. Planning to sell our things next week. Who needs things anyway? Less of things and more of Love, that is my choice. We are coming for you Ian, mommy promise.

Look everyone, I can move mountains! Even if they are made of foam:)

Buddy Walk Atlanta

This past Sunday was the Atlanta Buddy Walk for Down Syndrome. We met lots of folks who asked us, "where's Reece? and Andrea?" It was almost heartbreaking to have to report that Reece and Andrea were not in Atlanta;-( What was great though was that TONS of people knew about Reece's Rainbow and at least 5 families came up with serious questions about adoption, looking to take the next steps!

For us, it was great to be there and represent such a wonderful organization. We were also blessed to meet two other families from the Atlanta area that are adopting children now too. Look below to see who!

Our Tent and Table

Reece's smiling face just draws em' in!

Here is Cameron (L), she will be "Sonny's" mommy! She is talking to a mom that just became a Christmas Warrior for two RR kids!

and...here are 3 RR families adopting now!
From L to R:
Nancy & John Crews (adopting Hanna), Cameron Al-Khazraji (adopting Sonny),
me (adopting Ian), Kate Crews (Hanna's new sister) and my Ari (Ian's new brother)

My Hero Zero!

Drums please:

Today I clicked on our Reece's Rainbow Family Support Page and...there is a lovely, glorious, cute, beautiful, awesome NUMBER 7 in front of that zero! Zero stands alone no more! Thank you to the hero among us who donated to help bring Ian home!

Ari and Ian (kinda)

My baby boy turned 4, and we had a great pool party for him. It was wonderful, but we sure missed Ian being there.

So.....we made sure he could see all the fun.

My little four year old surf monkeys. I love em.

We are a GO!

The FBI Package

Our FBI prints and clearances came back to our Homestudy agency today and so we are GO FOR HOMESTUDY completion! This is GIANT! I expect a completed and apostilled Homestudy inside of two weeks (you would not believe how exacting this document has to be). This is also big in terms of fund raising, as we will have to submit $3500.00 to Ian's Agency and about $850.00 to US Immigration to get the ball rolling on that end.

I have NO DOUBT that we can do this, we will have to raise another $3219.23 in two weeks! God says do your best and he will do the rest. This should scare me but honestly, I'm excited to see just how God is going to work this out. I love that we get to stand by and watch the magic, it is such an awesome thing to know faith.

There is some other news brewing about adoptions in Ian's city but I will hold on that because frankly, I fully expect, because I fully believe, that we will be covered, and that we will get to Ian before he is moved to an institution.

Ari's turns 4 this week, my beautiful boy, the joy of my life, the best gift I have ever gotten besides being saved, is growing up too fast for this mama! For all the news that is fit to print on Ari, visit HERE.

A Special Give-A-Way

...inspired by people, places, philosophies and feelings...an influence of things both external and internal. Embracing the imperfections found in nature, the gemstones in this collection are chosen for their individual beauty. Raw beauty over bling.(artist quote)


A very special friend of Ian has donated a series of beautiful necklaces to the Hope for Ian Adoption Fund. It's all I can do not to keep even one of these stunning pieces for myself!

These pieces and the artist that created them have a special connection to the country Ian is from. What is even more rare, is that each stone she has presented us with cannot be sold in stores because they have what society terms, "a small imperfection." HOW PERFECT!

What beauty and deep cut meaning then, does each of these special, unsellable in stores, imperfect necklaces hold. Ian was taken "off the market" at birth, because of one tiny little extra chromosome that made him unwanted and "imperfect." Looking at him, I see nothing but God's perfection, and I am proud to "wear" one of these imperfectly cut stones to honor him.

Normally, these lovely necklaces sell for $80 to $100.00 in stores all over the world. They have even been worn around the necks of some very famous folks (look below)

Now, YOU can have own of your very own! All you have to do is click below to make a donation to Ian's adoption fund.

For every $25.00 donated
your name will be entered 1 time in the drawing for a necklace
(an absolute steal if you win!)

For every $50.00 donation
your name will appear 5 times in the drawing!

and, for those who simply must have the very best shot at one of these deliciously delicate pieces of wearable hope
for every $100.00 donation
your name will appear a whopping 25 times!

This special event will run until April 1, 2011. A winner is drawn every week. When donating, please be sure to note which necklace you would like to win (make a first and second choice) in the message area.

Click HERE to see each individual necklace that we have up close.
We are giving away 12 of these perfectly lovely pieces

What will happen to Ian?

With just 205 days until Ian turns 5, we face the reality of trying to raise 25K in order to save his life. The economic crisis is making it a challenge to raise money. If only I knew 25,000 people, at one dollar each, Ian would be saved. Please stand with us in prayer that we can do this in time to save our sweet boys life.

This is a borrowed entry from a lovely family who saved a child, Mary, from a fate similar to the fate that all of these children, Ian included, face if not adopted before transfer to the institution.

Read. Know. Give.

Sad news

Last fall/winter we ran a fundraising drive for this little girl named Olga, who lived in Mary's orphanage and (like Mary) was bound for the institution. Her CP was much more severe than Mary's (much) limiting her physically, almost completely. However, as so many have seen when bringing home these Reece's Rainbow children, there is no way of knowing what leaps and bounds she would have made given the chance.

As it became clear that no family was stepping up to come for her, we began the process of inquiring about providing a full time care-giver for her while in the institution. The organization Life2Orphans has been arranging this for children there who need extra care (they ALL do) funded by sponsoring families for NOT very much a month. The only best and even good thing is to get these children OUT of there but the truth is they won't all get out. A caregiver could have made sure she was given physical stimulation, enough food, etc, all under the watchful eye of the Life2orphans personnel. Again, with the hope that, in time, a family would come and take her home.

Well, Olga has gone home. We received official word today that Olga passed away on August 16, 2010. Antoshka had kept her as long as they could, but when she was finally moved, she did not last long.

I cannot fully put into words how I feel about this. Yes, there is a relief that she does not suffer. However, I must be honest and say that trite words about "God's plan" will not be received well. I believe God showed us His plan in His son, and in the words of His book. We are supposed to do better than this. All of us. This is NOT His will, for children to suffer and die alone in the world.

In some ways my faith in Him and His heart feels stronger because I believe I have shared in His pain over Olga's little insignificant life. I believe I was given a gift to see her on some small scale, as He sees her, and hurt for her as He does for each and every one of His children.

But in other ways I feel jaded from the experience, and find certain songs hard to sing - certain statements hard to "amen!". I suppose that is to be expected when you know what you'd like to wish you didn't know, but you can't wish that because if you didn't know ... and didn't care... you know you'd live a shallow insignificant life of your own.

This is going to change things. I can't say what or how yet, but it does. We hope to travel with Life2Orphans on a missions trip, and this solidifies that desire. For now, those who gave SO generously, please know that Reece's Rainbow will distribute that money to the "Other Angels" fund for older children waiting for families to adopt them. So many happy stories are shared there on the homecoming page. Your gifts are not in vain.

“Sometimes I would like to ask God why He allows poverty, suffering, and injustice when He could do something about it.”

“Well, why don’t you ask Him?”

“Because I’m afraid He would ask me the same question.”

(Anonymous) -a quote from A Hole in the Gospel, by Richard Stearn

18 years old today

Ian's lovely cousin Lynzay Marie Legois would have been 18 years old today. She would have loved you Ian, and prayed for you. I know she is watching over you.

Ian's Book

All glory to god for putting this special task into the hands of HF, Anna's mommy. Words can never be enough. We hope to leave this book with Ian when we are forced to leave him at the orphanage after our first trip. We don't want him to think we just left him and that we are not coming back.